An individual is someone who must… With the fact that he could be wro… And there’s no way to know for sur… But the choice must still be made The internet offers certainty
The best way to feel in control even though all control is an illusion is to stand in a line
John F. Kennedy’s hair was so lus… for the most part men never wore hats again At first we must have looked oddly like tub…
Relationships are hard work unless you’ve preemptively announc… that you’re quitting but staying on as a volunteer
All self-help books boil down to this: You can’t fold a piece of paper more than 7 times but if you could fold it 103 times
We think nothing’s shocking since we’ve seen it all when really it’s because we’re blind to the obvious
My matchmaker couldn’t find me any… but she suggested I go to the bing… and focus on the woman who played the most cards per game
In a failed democracy the one thing both sides can agree on is that the real traitors are the loyal opposition
You know a hipster is aging gracef… When he comes to see that Objects in mirror Are closer than they appear
The worst-case scenario comes true when enough people believe it’s the best case scenario
Your search for a vein is now done in vain under the soft tyranny of wireless narcotics in whose touchless embrace
Actual justice consists of hearing both sides of the story in order to decide which side is in the right meaning that justice
In the act of creating new life men presage their relationship with death
It wasn’t false modesty exactly You might call it un-unpretentious if you were being pretentious
When they closed all the beaches my dad said not to worry and I just knew he’d install the swimming pool I’d always wante… Instead, I came home from school