What I lack in hygiene I make up for in sleep hygiene
They say seeing is believing but believing is doing so, logically, seeing is doing and I see what you’re doing so, I know what you believe
Mysticism, esoteric knowledge, these are euphemisms for what’s hiding in plain sight: We are not alone
Instead of a Che Guevara t-shirt I have a Carol Burnett henley
The new Speech Code prohibits use of the phrase “Speak for yourself” due to its aggressive tone and threatening connotations
My favorite plot twists have always been quicksand and amnesia but I have this sinking feeling I’m forgetting something
I am going to delay early retirement until everyone is middle class
I’m not at liberty to say exactly… Batman and Robin change their clo… while sliding down the Bat Poles but I can share that it involves a lot of Alfred’s band…
Most tautologies are self-fulfilling prophecies For example: Most people are average But God never met
The kingdom of heaven is like two otherwise mediocre individuals making a great couple
It’s not that we’ve abolished death but we’ve made it a mere formality
When words fail you’re getting close to the truth But we’re just about to talk ourselves into
Male materialists rarely make for marriage material because in their insistence that life’s not fair they further insist
I thought I could keep the family… until I realized I was the family… So, all the time I was afraid of… the family’s dirty laundry I was already wearing
You know the (re)normalization of… is in full swing when the New Yor… justifies its publication of a cro… in the shape of a swastika on the start date of Chanukah