Actually, we all died in the pande… Life– I can’t afford not to Pandemic life– I can’t afford to… The afterlife– I can’t afford not…
If you want to know what the quarantine was like for me walk a mile in my new leather sweatpants
Initially, as you approach hell it feels like you’re getting a warm welcome
In inter-family feuds eventually the gloves come off but in intra-family feuds the masks come off
Unlike the Americans and the Engl… who are divided by a common langua… the Americans and the Parisians are divided by a common symptom: disappointment
My wife now relates to me very much as she does to stinky cheese
Asked for his thoughts on God the materialist replied Nothing doing The mystic said Exactly
We can be given responsibility by God but we can only take control
You’re only a real materialist If you demand that believers Do the impossible And then get angry When they prove you wrong
Your life is just a reflection of… So, imagine what would happen if The first cause was your first pri… In the beginning It just might cause you
Evil is cruelty plus pleasure
I fist met Cap’n Crunch back when he was 2nd Lieutenant C… He did this weird thing where he’d… in the powdered milk powder and sa… Stays crunchy even in milk!
Well at least he died doing something he felt he had no choice about
You know the (re)normalization of… is in full swing when the New Yor… justifies its publication of a cro… in the shape of a swastika on the start date of Chanukah
I thought the Protestant work eth… I saw all the lazy rivers in peopl… until I noticed they were each swi… against the current