The discomfort that Americans now all evince in one another used to be reserved for old people who get rich quick
Faced with a forced choice The agnostic feigns ignorance For if you ask a woman to marry yo… And she says I don’t know
The true test of power today is whether or not you can be forced to accept a forced apology
Easy to please but problematic to appease
First they promised us belonging Afterwards they clarified that they meant You belong to us
Ours is a culture of low tolerance masquerading as a culture of low risk tolerance
Sanity requires distance And social media is always Right at our fingertips
If Wile E. Coyote ever caught the Roadrunner he’d suddenly lose interest
No shoes, no shirt, no service Just say no Do not pass go, do not collect $20… Don’t call us, we’ll call you No pain, no gain
No one seems to see (least of all me) that being all you can be isn’t about clutching superiority– it’s for abjuring mediocrity
The cogito may be airtight but its reverse– I am, therefore I think– is less certain
The conceit of individualism was that you could have a type without even wondering if you might be a type
When life gives you A bottomless pit Fill it with Bottomless fries
Hell is having infinite wishes but using them all to wish for infinite wishes Heaven is having infinite wishes but only needing
When they shut down Ringling Bros… a down on his luck clown looked into a second career as a m… but was informed that the mimes were only accepting applications f…
