Human beings have always used the symbolic to navigate the real; until recently we did so by imagining that the symbolic is rea… whereas scientists imagine that
Denial was a lot easier when your head was in the clouds but your memories were stored on microfiche
I was the first ever lobster discovered in the wild with a rubber band around my claw clamping it shut
We got the five day work week because that’s how long it takes a python to digest it’s meal
As the public version of one’s pri… social media is the recurring drea… of showing up at work without any… come true
The New Revised Standard Version… A frenemy of yours is a frenemy of… whereas the New King James Versi… The frenemy of my frenemy is my fr…
When the loyal opposition smelled a rat the administration’s defense centered on the fact that it wasn’t the rats that had carrie…
I’m always leaving things at church so the lost and found won’t be empty
There are only two real superpowers: unacknowledged plagiarism and begrudging cooperation
Paper comes from trees but when money was made of paper we all agreed that money doesn’t grow on trees
We went from wearing galoshes over… to wearing galoshes over our shoes… to wearing galoshes as shoes and now we wear galoshes over galo…
The reason every man has his price is because he always fails to real… 1. that he can never get what he w… 2. this makes his desire priceless
Antisemitism is suddenly easy to f… It’s a mile wide and just scratch the surface an inch deep– You’ll find it there
We guard the thin line between love and hate by loving more But we cross the thin line between self-love and self-hate
In this age of relentless people p… the merest exercise of reason is always a form of treason