On the one hand even the talking cure can’t cure death On the other hand you can’t talk it to death
Staring at your phone came to be known as the thousand yard stare
All the real archetypes are from the circus and I thought I was a clown until I found myself shot from a cannon
Marriage is the only place I’m neither feature nor bug but both
In a few years we’ll all look back on liberal democracy and fake laugh
Everybody knows That everybody hates group project… But everybody is a group project Which is why everybody hates thems… Unless the group wisdom
When they start to call you clear-eyed it just means you’re a cynic whose time has come
When I was a young man I couldn’t see the forest for the trees Now that I am old and wise I can’t see the forest
It feels like I’m writ– ing an unauthorized au– tobiography
You can’t watch sports these days… Father Time is undefeated Which is when I always quote Saul… “Vait a minute. Vat about Rocky…
I am not who I think I am I am not who you think I am And I am not even who I think you… I am who I-Am-Who-I-Am thinks I…
Like Coke for Coca-Cola, Mr. Pibb is short for Mr. Pibb, ABD
When randomness blends with lawfulness you get the Loch Ness
Less self-interest is in your best interest except on Pinterest
My matchmaker couldn’t find me any… but she suggested I go to the bing… and focus on the woman who played the most cards per game