That moment when you reclassify yourself from a mystery to an unsolved mystery
The fog is so thick now We’re buried up to our necks in it Our bodies out of sight And out of mind Making the ground beneath our feet
This is going nowhere so, by all means let’s keep going
Social media is a dream come true– Finally, I can keep up appearances while letting myself go
The three most powerful words in the English language are not I love you; they are So be it
The culture war is a total war burning down everything from sea to shining sea
On planet Earth there are natural… Anything you do comes with natural… On Google Earth there are no limi… You can do anything you want But anything you do
In the first take of Braveheart’s… Mel Gibson directed William Wall… “Freedom and responsibility!” But as a practiced antisemite Gibson quickly realized his error
The internet wants to tell you a l… Instead, let me tell you a secret: After the Holocaust Antisemitism was buried just deep… That it came to seem an anachronis…
I thought I’d crafted a mystique when all I’d rea– lly made were mistakes
If things feel prearranged it’s because you’ve already rearranged
Almost every student prefers and l… But will almost always take the vi… Because those classes are always e…
You have a real life if there are no easy solutions You have a real problem if there are no easy solutions but there is an easy way out
Instead of shooting bullets into t… to celebrate I raise my leaf blower towards the… On blue moons I do this from my jet ski
I may look like a tall glass of water but be– ware, I’m half empty