Guilt is intolerable which is why “I can explain everything” is processed into “I have a theory which explains ev…
When did we ditch the Pledge of Allegiance for the wedge of a grievance
Physically unscathed after a life of piracy he was forced to lean heavily on his emotional scarring
I don’t care about birds but I thrill when the squirrels can’t get to the birdseed
Reason is a gift from God But it is not the path to God There is a reason for this: God’s love for you is unreasonable
If you count the rings on a tree stump it will tell you the cost of doing business
Somewhere between 27% and 53% of… none of which students can legally… is wasted Let’s split the difference and call it 40%
We hit it off: she’d declawed her cats and I’d plucked my cacti’s needles
Given a choice I’d rather open a restau– rant than my marriage
I won’t rest ‘til O– prah puts me on the cover of her magazine
Dreams don’t come true; They are true
It’s not a wine and cheese crowd unless everyone there hates crowds
When a tone deaf authority insists you watch your tone it’s because they would never ask you to do something they aren’t already doing themselv…
When I started telling my employe… Apologies in advance! they still felt compelled by decor… No apologies needed which was how I ended exploitation
We went from wearing galoshes over… to wearing galoshes over our shoes… to wearing galoshes as shoes and now we wear galoshes over galo…