#MentalIllness
i’m sitting in an old 2000s chevy with r&b music playing loud from t… my shoulders slipping out from und… and i’m either a sex symbol or something holy.
i let you watch me lose my goddamn… raging at the wallpaper and crying… i let you listen to the burning an… and the pop of a pill bottle openi… i let you feel the screaming apolo…
you hurt me so much, but i never h… i just hated you for telling me it…
i feel your words in my bones, and… you’ve got me shaking, you’ve got… you ever think about the fact that… i do, every goddamn day. you came into the world with a ven…
you ask me if i have dreams and i start telling you about the… that haunt me when i try to sleep but then you look at me and laugh uncomfortably and say,
blurred around the edges took a couple naps today. almost started a fight, then i didn’t and held someone ins… i feel lucid and fluid.
you’ve stopped responding to my te… and now i’m wondering, if maybe you’ve finally gotten bored of me. i can’t blame you, cause if i were… i would’ve gotten bored as hell to…
i am far more childish than i ever allowed myself to be
sometimes i think, when i’m sitting here doing jacksh… that you are only here with me, sticking it out, cause you’re hoping i’ll be someon…
“do you still think i’m pretty?” i… mascara running down my face, lips…
i flick the lighter on, on, on off. a useless fidget, one that turns my thumb gray and r…
the ocean makes a damned pagan out… i turn into the little kid i was w… the ocean reminds me i’m in limbo. reminds me i’ve come from boat peo…
i waited for the other shoe to dro… oh, it did. “i’m sorry,” i said, “for trying t… you smile and say, “i’m used to it… “you shouldn’t be.”
he’s full of tuesdays and peonies, and i’m made up of saturdays and b… so he says, forgive and forget, and i say, get high and throw dart… he’s got his arms open wide
but i don’t think you were ever built to be a mother, and i never learned how to love you without it burning me from the inside out. i was raised to trust you through every betrayal and...